Losing my nana pegg

Afew weeks ago my nana pegg passed away I was devasted I hadn’t seen her since December 2019 and had only been able to speak to her on the phone due to the lockdown. I remember whenever i would speak to her she would always say how she was looking forward to being able to see me and my brother again .I was so sad I never got the chance to say goodbye to her and tell her how much i loved her and how much she meant to me but i know that she knows that.

she was an amazing women my nana pegg was Irish and she was so proud of that she used to tell me stories all the time about her life in Ireland  when she was a little girl and about her family I will really miss her stories my nana loved life and people  .We would be walking down the road and if she spotted someone with a dog she would have to go over and say hello or if we were out having lunch and she saw a baby she would have to wave and say hello and start talking to them I loved that about her.

She was so friendly and caring and didn’t judge people at all she would stand up for what she believed in and wouldn’t back down no matter what that’s what made her so special to me. She was a strong women and I hope I continue to take that throughout my own life to stand up for what i believe in and not stay silent when it’s  something that matters to me that’s something that my nana taught me well thank you for all the lovely memories nana pegg I will cherish them for a lifetime.

Interview with my brother

Today I’ve written a different kind of blog this is an interview i did with my brother all about his new being the best you journal,what motivates him to keep working hard during the tough times and how he knows that his purpose on this earth is to help, inspire and motivate people to live there best lives to.

What inspired you to create your being the best you journal?

I was inspired to create the journal after releasing my first book being the best you in June 2019.The book spoke heavily about my own journey what I’ve overcome and the different tools I’ve used to get to where i am today.A lot of people seem interested by what i do each day to get to a centred and positive state.I decided to incorporate all of my own tried and tested techniques into the journal.

What helpful tips do you hope people will take away from the journal?

I hope people take away whatever it is they feel they need in order to move forward and become the next level within them.In the journal there will be things that will resonate heavily within the reader and other tools may not which is why I’ve included so many so there is something for everyone.No matter which area of your life you hope to improve/work on if I had to chose i hope the reader takes away the gratitude practice its one of my favourites and its the most simplistic and easy thing ,but so many of us myself included  at times,forget the importance of giving gratitude and being grateful for what we have.

What motivates you to work hard and keep positive a outlook on life ,even in tough times? 

That’s an interesting question i think the main motivation i have to work hard is the life purpose i have my propose is to help others unlock their truest potential whilst having alot of fun in the process if I had to whittle my purpose down to just one simple sentence that would be it.In terms of keeping positive during tough times it isn’t always easy sometimes i cry,I have a moment and than come back to my place of power, where i can move forward in a positive direction to my next step.

What do you do to help yourself when your having a down day?

For me this is the area where i feel the luckiest because i spend my life exploring tools and techniques to help others,which means when I’m having a down day or just not feeling my best i have a whole mental toolbox i can open and pick out various things to give me a boost.I will journal how I’m feeling and why I’m feeling a certain way,I’ll get out into nature on my own and have time outdoors to refocus and breath, I’ll sit in meditation or do a breath work session or I will watch one of my favourite reality tv shows.

You can buy being the best you journal from 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Best-You-Journal-Jack-Walton/dp/1527262588

https://www.waterstones.com/book/the-best-you-journal/jack-walton/darby-jasmine-hutchby/9781527262584

https://m.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-best-you-journal-jack-walton/1137522305?ean=9781527262584

Dating and mental health

Im back it seems like a lifetime ago since I last posted probably because so much seems to have changed and its now been over two months in lockdown i hope everyone is ok and staying safe remember we are all dealing with this the best way we can nobody has ever experienced this before so were all learning as we go don’t be to hard on yourself ok now on to today’s post.

When my anxiety was really bad i really struggled to ever imagine myself dating or ever being in a relationship with someone I remember sitting in my moms bed having really bad anxiety one night and saying to my mom whos ever going to want to be in a relationship with me and who’s going to want to deal with my bad anxiety all the time when i can barely handle it myself.

looking back that makes me feel really sad for past molly as i like to call her because I didn’t value myself at all and i thought that because i suffered poorly with my mental health that in some way made me to difficult and unloveable with obviously isn’t the case and is something I’ve only learned as the years have gone by and as my mental health has improved.  It was only really by having counselling that i began to realise that i am worthy of love and that the right person  will come along when its  the right time and that just because I suffer with my mental health doesn’t mean I’m not worthy of that 

Social media definitely made things worse at that time as i would look on places like Instagram and see what i thought were all perfect relationships but newsflash there is no such thing and i really wish i would of realised that.

Those happy smiley couples might be dealing with their own heartache or might just have had an argument just before they took that picture or have been  arguing over who does the washing up every couple has their own issues that they have to deal with i really wanted to write this post for past me really and anyone else who right now is thinking that their mental health condition makes them unloveable and not worthy of love trust me that’s not true you deserve to be loved for exactly who you are and shouldn’t have to squeeze yourself into a mould to have that be you and be true to who you are because really isn’t that all we really can do. 

Mental health

I wasn't sure if I wanted to write this blog post or not but after the sad news of Caroline flack taking her own life on Saturday I felt compelled to write something after I heard the news on Saturday I was in complete shock.  Today as I'm writing this I still am and have been thinking about it ever since its so sad knowing that Caroline felt that taking her life was her only option I know for me and my own mental health struggles over the years I have had some really dark moments. where I've felt that there was a big black cloud hanging over me at all times and I couldn't escape the feeling of impending doom that at times felt all consuming and that there was no way out of the big black hole that I had fell down but with the support of my family and also multiple years of having counselling I've been able to pull myself out of that dark space it has in no doubt been easy but I feel so lucky to have the support network around me that I do and that I know I can also count on to lift me up in dark times.


 If I'm honest I do still have days or weeks or sometimes months where I feel that dark cloud coming over me again and for me I've found the best way is to not fight that feeling and know that in time it will pass sometimes I find journaling and writing down the way I feel helps get it off my chest and down on to paper and sometimes I find getting out into the fresh air helps clear and calm my mind even just for a little while its the little things that sometimes help and than honestly sometimes nothing helps that much and I just have to wait for that cloud to pass over me and wait for the sun to shine again which I always have faith will come .I've been thinking a lot about Caroline's family this week and what they must be going through right now and how they must be feeling and it really makes my chest ache just thinking about it I just hope from this we learn to be kind to others and think before we speak and post online because once those words are out there you have no control over them or how they might affect or perhaps destroy someone's life as Caroline herself once said in a world where you can be anything be kind I think that about rounds it off for today I hope your all having a good week and if not that's ok just remember the sun will come out again.

here are some different charities who are there to help if you find yourself struggling
https://www.samaritans.org/
https://www.mind.org.uk/

Happy 2020!!!!!!

Happy new year i can’t believe its now 2020 and were in a new decade that feels so weird to type January for me has always held with it some pressure i think over the years that has meant thinking that I need to in some way be different or better than i was the year before and have more goals for the year ahead.

As ive gotten older I’ve come to realise that the way i was thinking was wrong and that i was putting far to much preasure on myself and as were now into a new year I’ve made a promise to myself that I’m not going to put that guilt on myself and feel down if i don’t achieve all the goals I’ve set for myself I’m just going to try my best to focus on the things that i do achieve in the year.
I’ve already written down some goals that i would like to focus on in the year ahead and i know that everyone has goals that are personal to them and even though i wasn’t going to share any of mine there’s one that’s so important to me and my mental health that I’m going to share it  I’m going to be starting therapy this year

 I’ve had counselling quit alot over the years and have stopped at various times when I’ve felt that I’ve no longer needed it but one thing that I’ve learned is that for me i need to have someone to talk to so that i can keep on top of my anxiety and not let it get the better of me and I’m hoping that starting therapy really helps keep my mental on track and its nice being able to talk to someone who isn’t a family member or friend and who’s unbiased and can give me their honest opinion on things and i know that for me having thearpy is so important to me because as I’ve suffered with my mental health for quit afew years now.

 I’ve realised just how important keeping my mind healthy is for my overall well being so if anyone reading this is struggling in silence afraid to speak up and ask for help please know that your not alone and there are people out there who care about you and will listen to you i think that just about wraps it up for this post i hope you’ve all had a great start to 2020 speak soon .xx

I have some exciting news!!!!

Hi I'm back I know in may I had all good intentions of being back sooner and posting more to my blog but truthfully my motivation for this blog had hit rock bottom and I was doubting myself and was saying things like what's the point in writing them know ones going to read them but ive come to the conclusion that it doesn't matter if no one really reads them because that's not why I started this blog in the first place it was so I could have a creative outlet for myself and enjoy writing again and so that's what I intend to do and if someone does read it than that's great hi if that persons you I really appreciate you taking the time to read my blog it means a lot.

ok now I've finished my long ramble I have news I'm currently working with the princes trust on their enterprise programme as I really want to open a queer inclusive coffee shop its been a dream of mine for quit along time but I was always to scared to peruse it but I'm hoping with the help of the princes trust and some really hard work I can turn my dream into a reality and really want to document the whole process I've been working with the princes trust for a few months now and I'm currently working on my business plan I've certainly had moments where I've been doubting myself and my abilities but with the help of my business mentor I've felt more able to push on as its nice having the support of someone else and to have someone else believe in and say you can do it .Well I think I'm going to leave it here for today and promise this time I will be back sooner you can hold me to it this time I cant wait to see what happens in this next exciting chapter that I'm going on the ups and downs lets do this.speak soon

IM Back!!

Wow its been a while hasn't it, I could start telling you how I've been really busy and haven't had any time to think about writing on my blog, but the trust is I just didn't have the motivation and I didn't know what to talk about, and that if I did I just wouldn't have anything interesting to say. I finally decided that it doesn't matter and that I'm writing these blog posts as much for me as it is for other people, and its a way for me to vent what's on my mind and to be creative. 

 I'm really looking forward to getting back into uploading more regularly but I'm not going to put any pressure on myself like the last time, if I feel like uploading a post than I will but if not I wont be hard on myself and put myself down just because I haven't stuck to my goal of frequently uploading. I find motivation can be difficult and its defiantly something that I really struggle with especially as I volunteer from home and find that the only person I have to tell me to get my work done is myself and trust me I'm not a very strict boss at all ha yah sure molly take the  morning off and start your work in the afternoon if you want and don't worry about the fact that you haven't done much work this week, I'm sure you will get it done I trust you I think you get the drift I'm just not very good at pushing myself to get things done and I than spent that time feeling frustrated with myself that I haven't achieved what I set out to or wasted the day instead of getting the work done its defiantly something that I want to get better at though and make small steps to change .

I know that its not something that I can change overnight, and I need to have a better routine and try to stick to it ha wish me luck with that one but seriously to anyone reading this who also might be struggling with motivation just know that its a process and that its not a race it takes time sometimes to get into a routine and maintain it something that I defiantly know all to well and have really struggled with over the last few months especially,but I know with time I will get there and slowly I will learn  to stick to a routine for longer  (I'm defiantly hopeful ha ha).

 I hope you've enjoyed my all over the place ramblings it really does feel good to be back I promise this time I will back sooner and for anyone else who's struggling with the ups and downs of motivation try not to be to hard on yourself I'm sure your doing the best you can  speak soon .